The Real Slim Shady Lyrics by Eminem

The Real Slim Shady Lyrics

    May I have your attention please?
    May I have your attention please?
    Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
    I repeat will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
    We're going to have a problem here
    c
    (Verse 1)
    Ya'll act like you never seen a white person before
    jaws all on the floor like Pam like Tommy just burst in the door
    started whoopin her ass worse than before
    they first get divorced throwing her over furniture (scream)
    It's the return of the
    "Oh wait, no way, your kidding, he didn't just say what I think he did, did
    he?"
    And Dr Dre said
    ....Nothing you idiots Dr Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement (haha)
    Feminist women love Eminem
    Chicka chicka chicka Slim Shady I'm sick of him
    look at him, walking around grabbing his you know what
    Flipin' the you know who "yeah, but hes so cute though"
    Yea I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
    but no worse than what's going on in your parent's bedrooms
    Sometimes I wanna get on TV and just let loose,
    but can't, but its cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose
    my bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips
    and if I'm lucky you might just give it a little kiss
    and that's the message that we deliver to little kids
    and expect them not to know what a womens clitoris is.
    Of course they gonna know what intercourse is
    by the time they hit 4th grade,
    they got the discovery channel don't they?
    We ain't nothing but mammals; well some of us cannibals
    who cut other people open like cantaloupes.
    But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
    then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope
    But if you feel like I feel I got the antidote.
    Women wave your panty hoes, sing the chorus and it goes...
    (Chorus)
    I'm Slim Shady
    Yes I'm the real Shady
    All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
    So won't the real Slim Shady...
    Please stand up, Please stand up, Please stand up
    becuase I'm Slim Shady
    Yes I'm the real Shady
    All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
    So won't the real Slim shady...
    Please stand up, Please stand up, Please stand up
    (Verse 2)
    Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records
    Well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too.
    You think I give a damm about a Grammy?
    Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me.
    "But Slim what if u win wouldn't it be weird?"
    Why? So you guys can just lie to get me here?
    So you can sit me here next to Britney Spears.
    Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs
    So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
    And hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first.
    Little bitch put me on blast on MTV
    "yeah he's cute but I think he's married to Kim, hehe"
    I should download her audio on mp3
    And show the whole world how you gave Eminem V.D. (scream)
    I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups all you do is annoy me
    So I've been sent here to destroy you
    And theres a million of us just like me
    Who cuss like me
    Who just don't give a fuck like me
    Who dress like me
    Walk, talk and act like me
    It just might be the next best thing
    But not quite me
    (chorus)
    (Verse 3)
    I'm like a headtrip to listen to
    Cause I'm only giving you
    things you joke about with your friends inside your living room
    The only difference is I got the balls to say it in front of ya'll
    And I don't gotta be false or sugar coated at all
    I just get on the mic and spit it
    And whether you like to admit it (rip)
    I just shit it better than 90% of you rappers out there
    Then you wonder how can kidz eat up these albums like valiums.
    Its funny cuz at the rate im going when I'm 30
    Ill be the only person in the nursing home flirting.
    Pinching nurses asses when I'm jackin' off with Jergens and I'm jerking
    But this whole bag of viagra isn't working
    And every single person is a Slim Shady lurkin'
    He could be workin at Burger King spitten on your onion rings
    Or in the parking lot circling
    screaming I don't give a fuck
    With his windows down and system up
    So will the real Shady, please stand up
    and put one of those fingures on each hand up
    and to be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
    and one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?
    (chorus)


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